Confessions of a rookie writer
Editing will be the end of me.
It's all I've been doing for the past weeks/month(s) and I can say with confidence that I do not like editing. I will tell you why throughout this post even though I'm pretty sure that most of these confessions will make you wonder why I even want to write, I'll take my chances.
It's actually easily summed up in one line.
What's the main problem?
I lose myself very easily and feel like I am drowning.
I am overwhelmed.
There's so many things that need to happen, so many steps in this process that I do not master. I am only half aware of what I am doing and I more than often start to panic. I end up stressing over the littlest things.
I absolutely adore writing, creating new stories, discovering new characters. The creative part of my brain needs to put things on paper and get rid of the stories that are flowing through my head.
My blog title speaks for itself: I write to stay sane.
So when I have finished that story, have unleashed the characters in my head and made them cause all kinds of commotion, that's when I want to move on to the next adventure. I want to keep moving. What happens is that I end up with over 100 written stories in my documents folder and none of them will ever reach more eyes than mine.
Apart from the odd ones that are put online without much extra thought. I've been found guilty more than once of posting a story without re-reading it, without giving it a proper edit/revision. More than once have I given it a quick glance over, fixed the typos that crept in and changed the more obvious flaws in plot. Aside from that I put it on the internet for anyone who might be interested. I was lucky enough that people were always kind and supportive. They loved the stories and were never afraid to point out any mistakes I might have missed. However, I think my audience might have been too kind on several occasions.
Now things are different.
Now I am working towards a goal: a published book that will (hopefully) be read by an audience.
Now I have to edit and look at every single detail. I have to scrutinize and go over the same story over and over again.
A lot of writers are shouting how much they love editing. It allows them to create the story they wanted to tell and to make it the best version it can be.
Who wouldn't want that for their story? I know I want it for mine but that doesn't mean that I enjoy the editing process.
To me editing is constantly being confronted with all my weaknesses of which there are many (most of which you'll probably have seen make an appearance in my blog posts too). It is frustrating and has pushed me to the edge multiple times.
Punctuation is my worst enemy,
As are tenses.
I am horrible when it comes to punctuation. I think I know the basic rules but then I find myself struggling with simple things:
- Is that comma even supposed to go there???
- What's even the function of a semicolon?
- Surely, that hyphen shouldn't be there? Am I simply inventing new words now??
Not to mention my love for an extensive use of question marks and exclamation marks!
Or a combination of both! What was I thinking?!?!
Punctuation and grammar aside, and the latter I can try to blame on my Belgian nationality, there's even more I have to worry about. And believe me when I say that I wish it would just be limited to grammar stuff.
I am easily distracted.
I'm sure I'm not the only one but this is probably one of my biggest issues. I can not sit in front of something for a very long time. I will end up browsing the web for distraction or the kitchen for food. Usually I do both. Usually I never get past the kitchen anymore.
If I do happen to be able to get back behind my computer then there's a big chance I'll be back to doing something else. One of those things is already starting to type up new stories which brings me to my next point.
Every pitch that springs to mind is instantly more interesting.
I can be without inspiration for a new pitch for months and months, it's happened before and it will happen in the future. Unless, of course, when I am editing. All of a sudden the new story ideas are flowing, screaming at me to be written. I am never more inspired as when I'm trying to edit.
I'm pretty sure it's just my brain's way of trying to make me move on. Luring me away from the text document that already exists and trying to convince me I should be creating a new one (and secretly I agree and would take any given chance).
And last but not least:
At what point do you stop reading about how you should do something and just do it?
There are so many blogs and people that offer you information and books about 'how to be a writer', 'how to write', how to do this or how to do that and if you're not careful you'll end up doing more reading about how you should do something than actually doing it.
I have done so much research and read so many tips and tricks on how to become 'the best writer you can be'. Maybe the best writer I can be is a silly girl who has too many different things floating around in her head and puts them on paper so they're somewhere else. Maybe that's all I'll ever be. I think I could make peace with that. However, I owe it to that little 7-year old me who had a dream.
I'm sure that book will be there eventually but the road will be bumpy and filled with lots and lots and lots of chocolate!!!
A great article about quitting: https://pjrvs.com/a/quit
It's all I've been doing for the past weeks/month(s) and I can say with confidence that I do not like editing. I will tell you why throughout this post even though I'm pretty sure that most of these confessions will make you wonder why I even want to write, I'll take my chances.
It's actually easily summed up in one line.
Writing > Editing
What's the main problem?
I lose myself very easily and feel like I am drowning.
I am overwhelmed.
There's so many things that need to happen, so many steps in this process that I do not master. I am only half aware of what I am doing and I more than often start to panic. I end up stressing over the littlest things.
I absolutely adore writing, creating new stories, discovering new characters. The creative part of my brain needs to put things on paper and get rid of the stories that are flowing through my head.
My blog title speaks for itself: I write to stay sane.
So when I have finished that story, have unleashed the characters in my head and made them cause all kinds of commotion, that's when I want to move on to the next adventure. I want to keep moving. What happens is that I end up with over 100 written stories in my documents folder and none of them will ever reach more eyes than mine.
Apart from the odd ones that are put online without much extra thought. I've been found guilty more than once of posting a story without re-reading it, without giving it a proper edit/revision. More than once have I given it a quick glance over, fixed the typos that crept in and changed the more obvious flaws in plot. Aside from that I put it on the internet for anyone who might be interested. I was lucky enough that people were always kind and supportive. They loved the stories and were never afraid to point out any mistakes I might have missed. However, I think my audience might have been too kind on several occasions.
Now things are different.
Now I am working towards a goal: a published book that will (hopefully) be read by an audience.
Now I have to edit and look at every single detail. I have to scrutinize and go over the same story over and over again.
A lot of writers are shouting how much they love editing. It allows them to create the story they wanted to tell and to make it the best version it can be.
Who wouldn't want that for their story? I know I want it for mine but that doesn't mean that I enjoy the editing process.
To me editing is constantly being confronted with all my weaknesses of which there are many (most of which you'll probably have seen make an appearance in my blog posts too). It is frustrating and has pushed me to the edge multiple times.
Punctuation is my worst enemy,
As are tenses.
I am horrible when it comes to punctuation. I think I know the basic rules but then I find myself struggling with simple things:
- Is that comma even supposed to go there???
- What's even the function of a semicolon?
- Surely, that hyphen shouldn't be there? Am I simply inventing new words now??
Not to mention my love for an extensive use of question marks and exclamation marks!
Or a combination of both! What was I thinking?!?!
Punctuation and grammar aside, and the latter I can try to blame on my Belgian nationality, there's even more I have to worry about. And believe me when I say that I wish it would just be limited to grammar stuff.
I am easily distracted.
I'm sure I'm not the only one but this is probably one of my biggest issues. I can not sit in front of something for a very long time. I will end up browsing the web for distraction or the kitchen for food. Usually I do both. Usually I never get past the kitchen anymore.
If I do happen to be able to get back behind my computer then there's a big chance I'll be back to doing something else. One of those things is already starting to type up new stories which brings me to my next point.
Every pitch that springs to mind is instantly more interesting.
I can be without inspiration for a new pitch for months and months, it's happened before and it will happen in the future. Unless, of course, when I am editing. All of a sudden the new story ideas are flowing, screaming at me to be written. I am never more inspired as when I'm trying to edit.
I'm pretty sure it's just my brain's way of trying to make me move on. Luring me away from the text document that already exists and trying to convince me I should be creating a new one (and secretly I agree and would take any given chance).
And last but not least:
At what point do you stop reading about how you should do something and just do it?
There are so many blogs and people that offer you information and books about 'how to be a writer', 'how to write', how to do this or how to do that and if you're not careful you'll end up doing more reading about how you should do something than actually doing it.
I have done so much research and read so many tips and tricks on how to become 'the best writer you can be'. Maybe the best writer I can be is a silly girl who has too many different things floating around in her head and puts them on paper so they're somewhere else. Maybe that's all I'll ever be. I think I could make peace with that. However, I owe it to that little 7-year old me who had a dream.
I'm sure that book will be there eventually but the road will be bumpy and filled with lots and lots and lots of chocolate!!!
A great article about quitting: https://pjrvs.com/a/quit
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